Reading today of how Luisa de Carvajal made herself the slave of her two maids, the old desire for this kind of life sprang up again. What would I not give for someone to treat me in this way? I have asked Jesus to do it, to accept me as His slave. He seemed to say to me that I must carry out what He puts into my mind. I …
Self-conquest
February 4, 2022
Constant urging of Jesus to do “hard things” for him, things which cost. I shrink from sacrifice, but I know well He wants it, and I can never be happy or at peace otherwise.
February 1, 2022
Last night I rose at 1am and went down to the church, renewing before the crucifix my desire and promise absolutely to surrender all human comfort and embrace instead every possible pain and discomfort. With my arms round the cross, I begged Jesus to give me His courage and strength to do what He asks from me. I realised that if I prayed when tempted to give in, grace would …
January 27, 2022
Last night I rose at twelve and knelt in the cellar for an hour to suffer from the cold. It was a hard fight to do so, but Jesus helped me. I said my rosary with my arms extended. At the third mystery the pain was so great that I felt I could not possibly continue; but at each Ave I prayed for strength and was able to finish it. This …
January 22, 2022
My dear loving Jesus, what do you want from me? You never seem to leave me alone – thank you ever so much for that – but keep on asking, asking, asking. I have tried to do a good deal lately for you and have made many little sacrifices which have cost me a good deal, but you do not seem to be satisfied with me yet and want more. …
January 22, 2022
I felt Jesus asking me to make a long visit and wishing to speak to me. His message was: To note down the big sacrifices of each day as this helps me to generosity. To make a spiritual Communion with each person receiving. Greater abandonment still of all comfort – ‘absolute nakedness’. To make a half-hour’s visit during the day when I am able COMMENT: Fr Doyle wrote these words …
January 18, 2022
Our Lord wants me to give Him all I can give cheerfully, not repining or regretting any sacrifice; not saying, ‘I wish I had not to do this or suffer this cold or pain, etc’, but rather, “I wish I could do more for You Jesus, I wish it were colder’. COMMENT: Fr Doyle was a true Jesuit. In these comments, written on this day in 1912, he shows his …
January 17, 2022
It seems to me I have failed to keep my resolutions because I have not acted from the motive of the love of God. Mortification, prayer, hard work, become sweet when done for the love of Jesus. COMMENT: We are now 1 week into the year 2022. How have we kept our resolutions for the year? Most of us will have lived them imperfectly. Some may even have already …
January 7, 2022
During Exposition Jesus asked me if I would give up taking second course at dinner. This would be a very great sacrifice; but I promised Him at least to try to do so and begged for grace and generosity.
January 5, 2022
During the last three nights of the retreat I slept on the floor without feeling any inconvenience after, though I woke very often on account of the pain. This is the first time I have slept this way on more than one successive night. COMMENT: Fr Doyle was just one of the many holy men and women – including saints – who slept on the floor at night. For example, …
December 20, 2021